It’s SUMMER QUIZ time.
Hidden in the completely fictional story about a politician called Boris are the titles of three classic films. Can you spot them?
The Politician who thought he was Winston Churchill …
Boris struggled to pull up his shorts over his stomach and then he belched. The Adriatic sun poured down over him as the lounger protested at its load. He was reading ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ by Dale Carnegie.
The 1936 world-wide, best-selling ‘self-help’ book gave twelve reasons why reading through its pages might improve you. Number four was: ‘Help you to win people to your way of thinking’.
That was a given. He had ousted Dave by fixing the Brexit vote and was now waiting to become leader of the Party. He re-read on his phone a message from his publicist. ‘B. Great news. The recent attack on you by the Head of Transport for London describing your chaotic London Mayor introduction of eight cycle superhighways, thereby causing huge congestion in the Capital and already well over budget, mentioned your name eleven times. Fantastic.’
Collapse of The NHS
He sent an enthusiastic response. ‘MG will hate that. Fab. Please try to catch me. If you can, work on TM’s rejection by Macron. I’ll add to her pain by predicting the collapse of the NHS.’ He chuckled as he remembered the latest release from the BMA. Doctors should only see a maximum of twenty-five patients a session. The latest statistics revealed a national average of forty-three.
He reached again for his phone and tumbled off his lounger. He picked himself up, waddled over to a table and chair and sent another message:
‘My time is nearing. TM will fall. Tell Zoe to come over to work on my victory speech. I’ll book her a room.’
With a view to the imminency of the coming national emergency he reached the sands and began to speak out aloud.
We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France,
we shall fight on the seas and oceans,
we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air,
we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight on the beaches,
we shall fight on the landing grounds,
we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight in the hills;
we shall never surrender.
Brexit – A National Emergency?
He only needed to change a few words. 29 March 2019 would see a wave of anti-European sentiment. No Brexit agreement, no border controls, the fall of the pound. Everything needed to create the 1940 circumstances when Winston became PM. His Party disloyalty had been forgotten, his dire war record, including losing 10,000 men in Norway, put aside and his drinking covered-up. Britain needed a hero and Churchill was that man. The wartime leader metamorphosed into his modern form. Boris carried on and paddled in the warm waters. His speech contained everything which would stir the emotions.
He would repeat a phrase, time and again, to convey to the British people his willingness to lead the nation to independent victory. He must remember to text DT but, at this pivotal moment, his speech was the priority.
“The time has come in which we serve to save our national sovereignty.”
In a few weeks TM would be thrown out, his cronies would see him elected and the DUP would continue to hold up the Government (because he would give them anything they wanted). His pals in the newspapers would scream ‘National Emergency’ and he would be seen as the Churchillian saviour.
As Boris paddled on, his shorts were slipping down and the paparazzi took some great pictures of his bottom for the next day’s front pages.
The three films hidden above are:
‘Catch Me If You Can’ (2002. Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks star in the compelling and true story of US teenage fraudster Frank Abagnale Jr)
‘A Room with a View’ (1985. British drama based on the book by E.M Forster and starring Helena Bonham-Carter)
‘In Which We Serve’ (1942. British patriotic World War Two drama featuring Noel Coward)
Can you find them?